Cori

This is a picture of my brother Rocky with his step-daughter Cori.  Cori passed away on Boxing Day after a long and courageous battle with cancer.  She was only 26.  She had been in our family since she was 5 although as things deteriorated between my brother and her mom, we did not see as much of her as we would have liked.  She was a beloved big sister to my niece Samantha and an Aunt to Emery.   She will be sorely missed.  Although it is inevitable, I can't imagine losing a sibling.  I'm very close to mine.

Too Much Food

Ugh, Christmas is over and we had way too much food.  There were plenty of leftovers so my Dad pretty well won't have to cook all week long!  As the table was being cleared, I noted that there was a lot of good food left on the plates.  This annoyed both me and my Dad.  Because some members of the family are vegan, we had two versions of some dishes to omit butter and milk.  Next time we are making just one version (vegan) so that we save table space and don't waste food.  The other reason for the wasted food is the old "eyes bigger than stomach" routine.  People had been eating cookies all day so when dinner came, they weren't so hungry but wanted to eat all of their favourites.  

I kept a bowl of baby carrots (honest!) on the kitchen counter all day and ate those whenever the urge for a cookie came about.  I can honestly say I did not over-eat on Christmas and I think the carrots helped.  Of course the fact that I have a tenacious cold helped as my appetite and taste buds are somewhat diminished.

Other than the over-abundance of food, it was a good day. All of my siblings, nieces and nephews where there at one time or another and everyone was on good behaviour.  We babysat my great nephew almost all day.  He's 4 and a delight.  He loves his Great Papa's house.  Most of the time, he is easy to deal with... It's only when we want him to eat something (other than a cookie) that he says no.  We found if we just put the food in front of him and didn't ask him to eat, he will.  I made him some little banana pancakes, so he could just pick them up like a cookie when the urge hit him.  He also gives us a bit of business when it's time to go home.  I don't blame him.  Papa's house is fun and he's indulged non-stop.  

I was going to start dieting a bit more seriously on Boxing Day but I succumbed to the allure of the mashed potato.  I'm going to make a pot of soup today.  It's good, hearty, low cal and just what I need for my cold.  Here is my recipe (as written, this is vegan but you can add other protein such as chicken or lean sautéed sausage or a tablespoon of bacon bits for a smoky flavour):

2 tsp olive oil
1 small onion chopped
2 cloves garlic chopped
2 peppers chopped (any colour)
1 can crushed tomatoes
32 oz of low sodium vegetable cocktail juice
2 tbsp lemon juice ( I use way more)
1 or 2 can of beans. I used white beans and or black beans.
1 tbsp cumin
1/4 tsp cayenne
1/4 cup fresh cilantro (I used the tubed stuff)
1/4 cup fresh or dried parsley

Sauté the onion, garlic and pepper with olive oil in a stock pot.  Then add everything else except the cilantro and parsley.  Cover and simmer for 20 minutes. Then add the cilantro and parsley.  If it's too thick, add some broth.   This makes a lot of soup.  It can be made in a large crock pot but I prefer the stove top as it tastes more fresh.

Take a Deep Breath...

I am drawn to Calla Lilies because they were my Mum's favourite flower.  As I was leaving the grocery store today (at 5:30 a.m.), I walked by a display of them.  I found one with 6 lilies which was just perfect.  There were two taller ones and four small ones which represents my nuclear family.  (I took the photo on the left in a church garden in Paris.)

I miss my Mum most of the time but especially at Christmas.  And not just because she did 99% of the work which has now fallen to me and my sisters.    She made it seem so effortless.  All of the cookies and then the turkey, all the trimmings, the decorating, stocking filling and the present buying.  Never a complaint or a hint that it was all too much.  

It now takes at least three of us to recreate her efforts.  I find that I dread Christmas eve and day because I know I will be exhausted by the time it's done and will have to deal the myriad personalities that make up our extended family.  There are now 17 of us!    Christmas Eve used to be a small casual dinner of tourtière, with my parents, my sister, my husband and me.  After my Mum passed, the dinner grew so that we now have a full house and instead of one pie, I need to make 4!   So that is the reason I need to take a deep breath.  A deep calming breath.  I want to enjoy the day rather than just get through it.   I don't know if that's possible, but I'm going to try.  

Merry Christmas!

Hello Dollies Redux

When I was in Grades 7 & 8, we girls were tortured in Home Economics once a week by a she-devil teacher named Miss Adams.*  It was a mile from our school to the school with the facilities and there were many days when we trudged there with dread.  I can't say Miss Adams taught me anything that my Mum hadn't already taught me about cooking or sewing but she did teach me a lot about cruelty...however, I digress.  

I first heard about Hello Dollies from my sister Lisa who had suffered through Miss Adams before me.  Hello Dollies were the one thing baked in Home Economics that the students looked forward to.  They helped sweep away the unpleasant memory of the dreaded "Tuna-Touchdown Casserole," which contained an odd mix of canned tuna, canned peas, cream of mushroom soup and inexplicably...crushed potato chips.  Honestly, the girls were made to eat that crap and many were sick just from looking at it.  It was not one of the menu items when we cycled through and maybe too many young girls throwing up was the reason.  But again I digress.  

Hello Dollies are simple to make but I have never been able to make them without them falling apart.  The ingredients are assembled in layers as in melted butter, graham cracker crumbs, chocolate chips, coconut, walnuts or pecans and then pour a can of sweetened condensed milk over the whole shmear and bake.  I decided to try a different way which worked out very well.  Instead of graham crumbs, I used whole graham crackers and instead of layering, I poured all of the rest of the ingredients in a bowl, mixed in the milk and spread everything evenly on top on the crackers.  Nothing fell off or crumbled and they taste just the same.  

Hello Dollies are not a diet food but at this time of year and with all the baking going on, I'm not dieting.  In some ways I can't wait for the season to be over so I can get rid of all temptation again.

* Miss Adams aka "Old Biddie Adams"   Miss Adams disappeared from classes midway through our second year with her.  Rumour has it that she was fired when the school board discovered she was using school funds to purchase the fabric for the snappy 60's outfits she sewed for herself.  The fact that she broke a student's nose by slamming her face into a desk may have also had something to do with it. I'm glad she was gone before my younger sister had to endure her.

Can't make this one go away...

I spent most of yesterday in a state of disbelief and grief, as I can imagine did most people with access to any type of media.  The horror of the slaughter in Connecticut will not go away in our lifetime.  This keeps happening and then the arguments over gun control start up.  Hopefully, the hand-wringing and arguments will come up with a compromise that everyone can live with.  Of course there is no legislating the minds of individuals intent on harm...whatever the weapon...but maybe there is a solution that will make it less easy to kill so many so quickly. 

The Joyous Season

The Joyous Season is one of my favourite books.  It was written in the 1960's by Patrick Dennis.  It's about many things.  Family, divorce, the innocence of children...all played out over the Christmas season which is sarcastically referred to as "The Joyous Season" as that is when mayhem reaches a peak.  It is a very funny book and no matter how many times I read it, I always enjoy it.  Unfortunately, the book is hard to find.  I have a two copies as well as copies of almost all of Mr. Dennis' books.  He really was brilliant and with respect to Christmas mayhem, the author had a point.  


I love the Christmas season although it is a lot of work for me.  I have sewing and baking to do.  I haven't bothered to decorate my own house for a few years.  We spend most of our time at my Dad's house and we do plenty of decorating there.  I am suffering from inertia however and having trouble getting going with my projects.  I'd like to at least tidy up my house in case some company stops by.   I haven't even done my Christmas cards yet.  Maybe I'll dig them out today.  

My sister was at Trader Joe's in Rochester, NY on the weekend.  She brought me back a tub of the Dilettante chocolate covered cherries.  They are spectacular and irresistible.  The Rochester Trader Joe's is about 2.5 hours away from where I live, which is too close for comfort.  I see a road trip coming up.  Not just for the cherries, they have lots of neat stuff, including some vegan items for some of my family.  Yeah right!

I'm Back!

I haven't blogged in awhile.  I had a brief illness involving my nose and a lot of bleeding and then a cure which involved quite a bit of discomfort which left me a little weak of energy.  Then I went to DisneyWorld which is always a challenge for eating healthy.  

In DisneyWorld, I started each day right with a bowl of oatmeal, yogurt and fruit.  I drank lots of water and tried to eat apples throughout the day as snacks.  Apples in DisneyWorld are hit and miss.  They are usually Red Delicious which look nice but sometimes they are mealy.  If you're lucky, you'll find a bunch that are wrapped in plastic.  These are preferable to the ones that are naked.  We saw a kid in Hollywood Studios touch every piece of unwrapped fruit at one counter...so we opted for juice!   Unfortunately, I also had some fries.  These little beauties to the left were from a Nathan's at the Orlando airport.  In the hierarchy of fries, every one of these fries was a #1 which is my best rating.  At least I got the small portion and my sister ate some of them.

We got our exercise in Disney.  The walk from our room at the Art of Animation resort to the buses and restaurant was a 1/4 mile plus there was the walking in the parks.  We had to have done at least 5 miles a day.

Now that I'm home, I'm going to continue with the oatmeal for breakfast and walking.

A shout out to my cousin Susan who was in Disney with me and who reads my blog...I think she is the only one! xo

Walking Away...

I have this cool app on my iPhone and iPad which connects you with webcams all over the world.  This is a live screen shot that I took from a South African national park.  The elephant is walking away from the watering hole and I am walking away from candy.  I haven't had any for four days (other than the odd Fisherman's Friend cough drop).  For me that is a long time.  I woke up today not wanting any which is a relief.  I went for my morning walk and purposely walked away from, rather than towards, the store where I know they have Hot Lips.  Last week I was thinking about cannoli which is an amazing Italian dessert.  I wanted some but couldn't find any.  I even bought myself a set of cannoli forms so I could make my own but I didn't. I am exercising some control.

I made a cake for my wee nephew's 4th birthday.  I asked him what kind of cake he wanted and he said he wanted coconut with squiggles - I think he meant corkscrew candles.  So I made a coconut cake: white cake and white coconut icing.  The only chocolate was the middle layer of icing. Everyone said it tasted great but there were plenty of overt complaints from my family about the lack of chocolate. While I love chocolate, I was quite happy with the cake and did not miss the feeling that I had to have a slice of that cake or I would perish. The kid that I made the cake for loved it and that is all that matters.

I went to see my Dr last week.  She gave me a prescription for diet and exercise and I have to go see her in a month a little bit healthier.  I can do that.

Hot Lips

I am defeated by this candy. They are called Hot Lips and made by a Canadian company. They are delicious.  Sweet, chewy and cinnamon-y. They are hard to find but I know which stores have them.  I try to avoid them.  Why can't I feel this way about cottage cheese and carrots?

I had started my post-thanksgiving detox but then had to go to the store for milk.  Unfortunately they also carried these little babies.  I'm going for a long walk today, so maybe it will all balance out.

Thanksgiving!

We had our family Thanksgiving dinner yesterday at my Dad's.  I'm in charge of the turkey and stuffing as my sisters are vegans.  I forgot to buy sausage for the stuffing (we use a recipe from the 1950 Betty Crocker cookbook which practically every bride married in the 50's received) so my Dad gave me some from his freezer (aka the ice cave).  When I took it out of the wrapping, it did not smell funny but it looked a bit like it had been frozen and thawed and then frozen again.  Just a bit shrivelled.  So I cooked it with the celery and onion, mixed it with the proper spices and bread and stuffed it into a stuffing bag in the turkey.  I pulled it out when the turkey was cooked and tasted it.  It tasted a bit funny so I got my brother to taste it as well and he said it was off.  We threw it out.  My brother didn't swallow the bit he tasted but I did so I was worried about food poisoning the rest of the day.  I was ok.    I felt really bad about the stuffing as I'm usually smarter when it comes to food handling.  And stuffing is just about the favourite part of the meal in our family.  My brother used to take almost all of it when he was a kid until he was caught and had to give it back!  Now his son tries the same thing!   Anyway, the turkey was fine and we had enough other side dishes to keep us well fed.  

We had 6 pies!  My sister Lisa says there can never be too much pie but I really think there was too much yesterday.  3 pumpkin, one of which was vegan.  2 cherry and 1 apple. We only consumed 1 pumpkin, part of the vegan pumpkin, 1 slice of apple and 1 slice of cherry for 12 people.  So Dad will have lots of leftover pie which will suit him fine.

Lisa wants to have an all pie dinner one Sunday.  We would have a savoury pie and then a sweet pie for dessert.  We occasionally do theme dinners at Dad's to keep it interesting.  Like the all sandwich dinner  with whoopie pies for dessert or the "everything wrapped" dinner where everything had to be wrapped in something like a tortilla, lettuce or crepe.  Lisa also suggested an all "Loaf" dinner which could be very interesting.  

Once again, this was all about food and not necessarily the healthy kind.  6 pies is too much pie.  I told my Dad that I'm cutting down on the sweets I'm bringing to him for awhile.  He knows it's a good idea.  

I'm Walkin' Here!

These are my walking shoes.  I suppose they are actually running shoes but I use them for walking.  I was out of the habit for 2 and a half months but have started back again.  I usually hate it while I'm walking but feel so much better when I've done it.   I love these shoes, they are the most comfortable exercise shoes I've had in years.  On par with some black patent Nikes I had a few years ago and wore until they fell apart.  Alas, I could not find a replacement.  I found these, which are ASIC gel blur 33 (or something like that).  They are so comfortable and supportive (not to mention fun with the hot pink) that I bought two pairs so when these wear out, I have another set at the ready.    So...I went for a walk this morning.  My 3rd in the past 7 days.  It's a hard thing to get back to but I feel hopeful this morning that I can keep it up.  I am a champion procrastinator and I will let the slightest thing deter me from walks (or eating right).  This morning I was waiting for my sister to come over to pick up a cake I made for her (more on that later) before going on my walk.  I waited outside ready to go so I could get going as soon as she left.   It's also good for her to see me ready to walk as it inspires her to do the same.  

My legs felt heavy and I felt what I call splodgy.  This is how I feel when I've had too many bad carbs the day before.  Its almost like a hangover.  I had pasta at Dad's for lunch which was not a bad carb.  I followed that with Chinese takeout for dinner with my husband.  That did contain bad carbs and lots and lots of salt.  I drank my kombucha tea and some water pre and after the walk.  The distance today was only 2.2 km.  Better than nothing.  I have a new app for making called "Map my Walk."  It's pretty good as it shows you your route through GPS.  I find this one easier to use the the one I paid for called Walk Tracker.

This is a cake I made for my sister and her colleagues.  They needed a vegan gluten-free cake that they all could enjoy.  This is only my third gluten free experiment so I hope they like it.  I find the texture of gluten-free to be a bit strange, but the taste is ok.  Besides I covered it with my Mom's kick-ass chocolate icing which would pretty much make anything taste amazing.  If they like the cake, I'll be making cupcakes later in the week for the same group.  

Happy Birthday Rocky!

My little brother turned 50 this weekend.  In honour of this, I made him a doll in his likeness (at least in my mind's eye!).  Just so you know, my brother has very little hair so Li'l Rocky is wearing a hat.  Here is the doll sans hat.  

I also made him a cake that is supposed to look like a hockey sweater because he is a bit of a hockey fanatic. I think you can get the general idea.  It is covered in fondant and was my first attempt at using this stuff.   It wasn't as difficult as I thought it would be although rolling it out was a workout.  My brother has what he calls a "tradition" of swiping his finger through his birthday cake icing (I call it a "pain in the ass") and eating it.  This cake will have him foxed as the icing is hidden behind a fortress of fondant!  We are also celebrating my nephew Matt's birthday so I had to make a pile of cupcakes.  No doubt my brother will be able to mess up the icing on those.  

This blog is about my diet struggles and you can see why I have trouble when I am the chief cake maker in our family.   Every once in a while we try substituting a healthier dessert for Sunday dinner (we are still reeling from a crust-less pumpkin pie a few years back!) but the baked goods make my Dad happy and he is often looking for them as soon as I'm through the door.  I often bake him a little something to tide him over until dessert occurs!  I think his love of sweets goes back to when he was a boy.  His family did not have extras as they struggled financially. My Dad was one of the main bread winners from the age of 12.  He tells a story of the first time he had pie that is poignant.  He and his Mum were visiting a friend who was better off and he was offered a slice of banana cream pie.  His Mum told her, "He won't like it." (a bit bossy was my Nona!) My Dad said he wanted to try it and did and he was hooked.  Dad says his Mum didn't want him to have it because she knew he would want it again and they couldn't afford pie.  She was right.  

Macaroni!

Yesterday we had pasta for lunch at my Dad's.  I am impressed with how consistently amazing our family sauce is.  It was particularly good today.  Even the vegan version he makes for a 1/3 of the family is really good.  Not bad for an 86 year old!  I always feel like I have been drugged after I eat it as it makes me so calm and content.  I have no trouble with my sleep after eating it.   However, pasta is one of the things that I can't eat with regularity.  

I have basil growing in my garden.  This year I planted it right by my house entrance, so it is easily accessible.  This leads to the making of pesto and the eating of same over pasta.  I lamented last week that I had more pesto but no pasta for it when a friend said I should make it from scratch.  I did and after a lot of hard work, I had some irregularly shaped linguine that in texture and taste was very good.  An excellent delivery system for the pesto.  Dad recalled that my Mum (who is with the angels) had had a pasta maker and we looked for it yesterday.  We found it and he gave it to me, although I forgot to bring it home!  Probably just as well.

I'm trying a protein dominant diet for a few days, with veg, fruit and whole grains thrown in.  And walking.  And no pasta...

My Other Hobby...Writing

I have been writing long stories since I was about 11.  The first ones were rather progressive romances for an 11 year old as they included 2 very cute cowboys along with the heroine!  These were only shared with my best friend who wrote similar stories.  Her writing was always and continues to be much, much better than mine.  

Over the years I have started and abandoned many romance writing projects.  I have at least  5 different projects in various stages of completion.  I know the first time I tried to write a romance (other than my adolescent efforts), I thought it would be easy and quick.  I was wrong.  It is difficult if you are not a natural storyteller and I don't think I am.  I have a great imagination, just no follow-through.

My sister and I took a romance writing course last year.  We both did very well although the instructor had some odd ideas about our efforts.  I tend to write sweeter romances and I think she was pushing her students toward the racy stuff.

I've hauled out one of my favourites which is also the farthest along and I have been working on it.  And again, it is a tough slog.

I admire storytellers.  They are a special breed much like artists.  They have an ability to see the big picture and spin a good yarn.  When I read a good book, I am taken with how effortlessly it flows and how events are intertwined.  I don't know if I can do that but I have some time on my hands so I'm going to try.

Baking and Crafting

Baking and crafting are two of my spare time activities.  I'm lucky in that I seem to have inherited these skills from my Mum although she was an artist and I'm more of a technician.  

These things keep me busy although one is a dangerous activity for me.  I don't think I need to point out which one!  As some members of my family are vegetarian or vegan, I have had to adapt my baking somewhat.  It has led to a few tasteless disasters but I can now make a delicious vegan cake that will fool even my brother.  These are some cupcakes that I made for an office function.  

Baking and experimenting with baking are dangerous for me.  I decided a while back

 that I was only going to bake white cakes which I don't like it, but as I'm preparing, I will add a little of this and that and before you know it I have a nice spice cake... infinitely more edible!  I'm experimenting at the moment with vegan-gluten free cakes.  This is more difficult.  My first batch were edible but the texture was odd...especially after you started to chew!  I have to keep working on it as my sister wants me to make a cake for her.  

The other hobby is crafting.  The little lady above is one of my more recent efforts.  The crafting is much better for me as it keeps my hands busy and I am less likely to be eating while crafting.  For a few years, I always had a crochet hook in my hand in my spare time and I was thinner!  Then my iPad made an appearance.  Love at first sight and it kept me from my crafts.  I have started to crochet again and maybe I'll stick with it and it might keep me away from cupcakes!  

Kombucha!

A few months ago, I had my first taste of kombucha tea and really liked it.  If you are unfamiliar, it is a fermented tea beverage which contains pro-biotics and is supposed to be very good for you.  The problem was the $5.00 a bottle (in Canada!) price tag. I decided that I wanted to brew my own and set about trying to find or buy a "scoby" which is the acronym for "symbiotic culture of bacteria and yeast" which is what ferments the tea turning it into kombucha.  Local health food stores either didn't know what I was talking about or were too expensive.   So I followed instructions from the internet on the easiest and cheapest method to procure one.  I bought a plain bottle of un-pasteurised kombucha, poured it into a clean mason jar, covered it with a cloth and put it somewhere warm.  Within a week I had my own scoby which has multiplied many times leaving me with great tea and a bunch of scobys to spare.  So far no one else in my family likes the tea.  It is an acquired taste.  I make a few batches a week in various large glass containers.  

Not much happening on the diet front...I'm slowly getting back to the walking and trying to eat better.  Very early this morning, I successfully stopped myself from going to a 24 hour pharmacy to get jujubes.  But the day is young...

16 °C

Yay!  It was 16 °C this morning which was perfect for a walk.  So I was back on the road again with my walking.  I didn't walk as far as I usually do but at least I was out there.  I have to take advantage of the cooler mornings when they are here as this summer there haven't been very many.  It's funny, as a kid I could stay outside all day long and the heat never got to me.  Now, I can't bear it. 

Hitting Bottom

Believe it or not, I am hopeful that I have now hit bottom in my weight gain.  I am not near to gaining back all that I lost but it is enough that I can remember how miserable I was.  This is what depression can do.  I took the picture of the raspberries as they looked so pretty in the bowl and they are a good contrast to my food of shame picture.  It's Monday and I'm starting fresh. Again.  Lean protein, fresh fruit and lots of veg and some exercise.  My brother, (who needs to lose some weight and won't eat a vegetable unless it is coated in batter and deep-fried) has agreed that he will eat a diet that I compose for him for one week.  This will take place in a few weeks and we will see how it goes.  

More Food of Shame

Look at this plate of food.  It is a perfect example of what is wrong with my pattern of eating.  I start off ok with the lean protein but then I ruin it with that little bit of heaven known as the chocolate eclair!  It leaped onto my plate at the buffet before I could stop it.  One of my sisters takes a picture of interesting vacation meals.  This isn't interesting so I am going to file this plate under "Food of Shame."

Helpless

I have been depressed.  In March, I was laid off from my job due to a restructuring... so for the first time since I was 16 years old, I am out of work.  As I am an older member of the workforce, I am in a pickle.  Depression leads to eating too much and so I am in danger of undoing all the good I did in the past few years. I am helpless against the draw of over eating. I have to get a hold of myself and get back on track.  And of course I have to find a job.  I could take this opportunity to do something I've always wanted to do which is write a romance.   Maybe I will!

Viva Las Vegas...Not!

I've just returned from a few days in Las Vegas. Completely out of control eating. I'm in California right now and doing better, mostly because I am not in the constant company of forbidden food. I'll be going home in a few days and once again hope to begin again. I have a lot of time on my hands at the moment as I am currently not working, so I should have time to concentrate on my health. Let's hope so.

Cheese

I love cheese. I wish I didn't but there you go. Right up there with chocolate is cheese on my list of things I shouldn't eat.

I don't like all cheese. If it has no flavour (I'm talking to you medium cheddar!) or has hardly any actual cheese in it (sandwich slices), I can pass it by. But sharp and strong flavoured cheese, look out. Items prepared with cheese in restaurants often disagree with me. It messes with my digestion. I think it has to do with preservatives or the lack of actual cheese in the products, so I have learned to avoid or pay the price.

Like everything else, I have to learn to enjoy cheese in moderation. It is one of the things I can't have in the house, but I find if I have a good wedge of Pecorino, and use it sparingly, it satisfies my need for a cheesy taste and doesn't send me into a frenzy of cheese and that fabulous cheese delivery system...crackers.

I'm doing ok at losing right now but on the weekends I tend to fall off the rails and gain some back. I'm at a pace of about a pound a week, which is doable. Better than gaining.

Doing Ok

I'm doing ok. I am trying something new that seems to be working. It's low calorie but not crazy low calorie like Dr. B. I have a knee injury which is keeping me from walking as much as I'd like, I'm doing ok. Although I would love to lose weight as fast as I can gain it (I'm a world champ at that!), I know slow is better. I did well yesterday, I walked by about 10 places serving muffins and cookies and did not succumb. I was not entirely good though as I did manage to cram in some licorice before dinner. I was still down from yesterday so I'll take it!

January 2, 2012

Ah yes, a new year and new resolutions. I had a fairly craptacular year. Without going into details, I had some changes and the result has been depression = eating = weight gain. I gained weight in 2011. Not so much that I erased all my hard work, but enough to make my clothes a bit snug and have me feeling awful. This blog is called Every Day a New Diet and so I'm going to try something new for the next week or so. If it works out, I'll write about it here.