Retired again!

I was sitting in my work cube the last week of August.  I had just received a 2 page document from my boss which I had written and to which he had added 2 pages of useless comments.  2 pages.  The room started to spin and I felt sick.  Sick that this micro-managing tool was making me feel like crap.  So I smiled, fixed what he wanted and the next document I wrote was a resignation letter.  I'm lucky in that I had that option.  I can retire.  We have the economic means to do so.  The lifestyle will be changed somewhat if we stay in our house, but it could be done.  And I did it.

I liked where I worked and I liked the work I did.  I was investigating again and helping people, but I missed my free time.  I was well-liked there and they even gave me a party when I left.  With cake!  So I have left the corporate world and I won't be going back unless something spectacular comes along.

There is a dark cloud on my horizon though as my dear Pat has been diagnosed with a medium prostate cancer.  This means that it is medium aggressive and needs to be removed and soon.  So it's a good thing I'm home as he will be out of commission for 4 to 6 weeks and will need looking after.  The prognosis is very good so I'm not too worried, just concerned that he is going to be uncomfortable and hurting while he recovers.

Any plans to sell our house and move are on hold for the time being.  At least until he Pat is strong enough to help me with painting and purging.  I love my house and it has enough room for all my crafty ideas but if we downsize to a condo, things will be different.  My metal-smithing will have to go as I can't imagine soldering and hammering in a condo.

I am happy and content.

Since March!

I know, I know, it's been months since I have written anything.  No excuse other than l just didn't feel like it.

My sisters are away and I miss them terribly.  I'm counting the days til they are back.

I am enjoying this cool summer, I might actually go outside.

I'm waffling on retiring again.  I like the money from working but I don't think I like working anymore. I haven't made a doll in a long time and I miss it.  I like the idea of being able to take off at a moments notice with my husband and do what we want.  If we lived in a condo, we could just shut the door and go.  One day soon.

Ear Monsters

I see stories in the news from time to time about people who have been profoundly deaf and are hearing the voice of a loved one for the first time. Heart warming but now that my Dad is finally hearing again after being 90% deaf in one ear and 100% in the other for about 15 years, I wonder if it as overwhelming for the profoundly deaf as it has been for my Dad. He was missing so much in conversation that we finally convinced him to get hearing aids.  He has had them now for almost a week and he's not loving it.  He can hear himself drink coffee and his hair underneath his hat.  I tell him that we can can hear these things too but we learn to tune it out.   He no longer needs the TV at top volume and we don't have to shout, but he gets anxious when there are a lot of competing noises.  When it gets too much i.e.  if someone is talking too much or being too loud, he takes the hearing aids out.

I know he will get used to it eventually.  He said the thing he has missed the most is the sound of rushing water...  So, as soon as the snow and ice melt, he will go to the local conservation area to hear the water rushing over the rocks.  

We take our hearing for granted sometimes. And while my Dad is getting used to hearing again, I know he is enjoying hearing his great grandson laugh.

Weather Rage!

It's the first week of March and it is so cold outside that my eyes froze after a short walk.  The sun was shining so I thought I'd take advantage of it with a wee stroll for some fresh air... and it was too painful to go more than a few blocks despite being bundled up.  

I like my job but I don't want to walk to the bus tomorrow. I'm tired of my nostrils sticking together and my glasses fogging up.  We've been told there is relief on the way, and right now I'd settle for -10!

I got home from work feeling really angry with no clear reason. There is nothing bothering me except this unrelenting winter.  So I figured it out.  I have weather rage.   If I wasn't working, I'd be driving south right now.  Right now.

Itchy

A few days after I posted my January 1 optimism piece, I noticed an itchy spot on my shin. In roughly the same spot as a big bruise I got in the summer from a fall.   The spot grew with alarming speed and was eventually, after being seen by 5 doctors (first two thought infection, third and fourth on the right track and sent me to a dermatologist.   Within 9 days it spread over most of my body. The only spot to escape so far, is my face.  Small mercies.

I still don't have a diagnosis but I suspect a type of eczema. I used to get it every winter as a kid. This rapid and widespread is, I believe, called an "Id Reaction."  The original spot on my leg now takes up most of my shin but with greasy coatings of steroid ointment I am healing. So...I wasn't feeling up to posting.

Managing Expectations & Happy New Year 2014

I was ready to retire again last week.  I was a bit discouraged because I felt like I hadn't set the world on fire at the new job right away.   I had to step back and realise I wasn't working for the same company.  Success will come again.  I can be patient. 

With my husband retired now, the temptation to pack it in is strong.  Especially when we start talking about travel.  Then I realised time off and travel will come again.  I can be patient.

During my 20 months off, I didn't get as fit as I wanted.  More walking, less chocolate is the solution.   I will be healthier again.   I can be patient.

I make New Year resolutions.  I don't often stick to them but this year I'm going to resolve only to be kinder to myself.  That should be easy to do and in so doing, the rest should fall into place again.  I will be patient.