Retired. There I said it. I’m retired. This is a life-phase that I had not expected for about 5 or 6 more years. After a long and well-respected career in capital market regulation, I was downsized in a re-organization. Downsized and devastated. Over the next year, I found that I was too old (55!) and expensive to be hired in my chosen field. Depression ensued. Despite encouragement from my family and good chums (who are retired) that this was a rare opportunity, I felt like I had somehow failed. Financially it is viable for me to be retired, but it took a long time for me to accept it.
Which brings me to my closet. My closet was stuffed with the 46 pairs of shoes, previously mentioned, and lots of business wear. So stuffed that I could not fit in anything else. So everything that I wear with regularity was on the floor, dresser, and the strewn over the 4 boxes of office stuff that was also in there. And as almost everything that I wear is black, it made hunting for specific clothing very frustrating. The state of my closet suggested I was either optimistic at the prospect of finding a new job or I was depressed and unable to clear the stuff out. I think it was a combination of both.
I cleaned out the closet. I kept two suits and a few things that I thought I might wear again and dispersed the rest hither and yon. I can now see the back wall of the closet and clothes are hung up instead of on the floor. Yay.
So...I’m sorta kinda ready to accept that I am retired. At least for now. I won’t rule out another corporate opportunity if it comes along - although the thought of going downtown daily on the subway again gives me the shivers. Instead, I’ll concentrate on this next phase of my journey. I will try to write, make dolls and other crafty things and see how that goes. It is good that I have this opportunity while I’m still relatively young enough to enjoy it. I haven’t yet thrown my arms out and embraced it. But I will, eventually.
